


what to say to you

by orphan_account



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, I don't have any tags really, It's just Patton and Dee!!, M/M, Moceit - Freeform, platonic or romantic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:34:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21684037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Deceit wishes he knew what to say to Patton. Being honest about his feelings isn't exactly his strong suit.
Relationships: Moceit, Morality | Patton Sanders & Deceit Sanders, Morality | Patton Sanders/Deceit Sanders
Comments: 4
Kudos: 66





	what to say to you

_ <strike>Dearest ache in my heart,  
</strike> _   
_ <strike>Dear Patton,</strike> _

_For Morality,_  
  
_In the event that you read this letter, know that I have no need to lie on paper. The written word is so much easier to understand. I often find I have a certain disdain for speaking out loud around you, though it is certainly no fault of yours. I always think of what to say, but the matter of whether I should say it at all seems to creep upon me even in my most sincere exchanges. I have always had a bridge to cross the river, but I am afraid I am now left with only stepping stones when you are the one on the other side. Some are more prone to coming loose and sending me into the water than others, unfortunately, but I cannot figure out which ones. I want to know what to say to you._  
  
_This is stupid._  
  
_I’m afraid that I’m not good at writing about my feelings, either.  
_  
  
Deceit sighed and let his head rest on the writing desk, placing his hands over the back of his neck. It was way too late at night, and he was exasperated at himself, and simply exasperated in general. He thought that writing out what he wanted to say would be easier, but it somehow felt even more personal; something he still wasn’t used to yet. He had been working on it with Patton—with much resistance, mind you—but he couldn’t say that he had gotten better at it. He wanted nothing more than to sleep, but there was so much he wanted to say… Or write. Same difference.  
  
As he heard the grandfather clock in his room chime an unceremonious amount of three times, he sighed loudly, being dramatic for no one but himself. He crossed his arms on his desk and rested his face on them, not once opening his eyes as he did so. He just needed some sleep, and then he could finish dealing with his dilemma in the morning. With that, he allowed himself to drift off, his letter and other previous attempts still left on his desk.  
  


Patton hummed to himself as he walked with a skip in his step down the hallway, stopping only when he reached a black-painted door with golden edges. He had reached Deceit’s room, and although it really didn’t need a door, Patton thought it would be polite to knock before going into the deceitful side’s room. Technically, he could pop in if he really wanted to, but he insisted on a door to knock on before making an entrance. It was a more recent occurrence, Patton being able to go into the other’s room, that is. He wanted to keep that privilege, and what better way than to knock before barging in? Not that he would barge in.  
  
He reached his hand up and gently knocked twice, reciting them out loud with a “Knock, knock!” before pulling his hand away from the door. He rocked back and forth on his feet, an expectant smile on his face, awaiting the usual response of ‘Don’t come in.’ But it didn’t come.  
  
He waited for a couple of seconds, his rocking ceasing as he called out for a second time, “Dee? Knock, knock! Your good ol’ pal Patton is here!” He waited some more, but there was still nothing. He tilted his head and put his hand on the doorknob, twisting it slightly. It wasn’t locked. Was he allowed to go in? He hadn’t gotten a response, and Deceit was normally quite punctual when it came to people knocking on his door. Was he okay? Was he currently upset? Did he need help? Patton shifted his weight from foot to foot, having an internal debate with himself. It would be wrong to walk in without permission, but it would also be bad if Deceit needed his help and just couldn’t reach out properly to him. That was usually the case; where he needed Patton’s help to actually reach out to Patton.  
  
“Okay, just a warning, I’m gonna be coming in! Just so you know..! You can stop me!” He waited for a couple more seconds before twisting the doorknob and actually pushing the door in, walking inside. His eyes instantly landed on the corner of the room, where his scale-faced friend sat at his desk, head resting on his arms. Patton instantly shut himself up, realizing that he was asleep. He could have woken him up, how silly of him.  
  
He smiled to himself and closed the door behind him, quietly walking over to the side of the desk. Had he ever seen Deceit asleep? He didn’t think he had, so that was a first. The first thing he noticed was that the other looked oddly peaceful. When he was awake, he always looked like he was thinking of something, like he knew something everyone else didn’t.  
  
Patton looked over to see what was on the desk and found multiple papers strewn about, some crumpled and others not. There was one paper that stood out to him, which had a pen lying right next to it. He swore he saw his name on that paper and for some reason, his heart decided to pick up its pace. He carefully leaned over and took a longer look, picking up some of the sentences before suddenly stepping away. It sounded like a very personal letter and even though it was addressed to him, he felt like he was stepping over some line.  
  
_I want to know what to say to you._  
  
He looked back at Deceit, who was none the wiser to what he had just seen. Patton felt bad about reading parts of the letter; he would have to tell Deceit about it sometime, since it would probably plague him until he did. In fact, he wanted to tell him right away because he could already feel the guilt building up in his stomach, but he just couldn’t find it in him to wake the other side up. He probably needed the sleep if he hadn’t woken up when Patton knocked and called for him.  
  
So, Patton let himself smile again and he placed his hand next to Deceit’s own hand on the desk. He wasn’t sure why, but he let it sit there for a moment before he pulled it away and turned around, walking to the door. As he opened it and stepped back into the hallway, he stole a quick glance back at his friend, allowing himself a look that was probably more fond than it should have been before he softly shut the door and walked back down the hallway.


End file.
